But who cares how old I am? You don't. I sure the hell don't.
When I first started being a "Jock" it was with cycling. My dad got me into mountain biking wayyy back. Before suspension, disc brakes, SPD's, before all the new carbon fiber or Ti frames. Hell, I think my bike only had 15speeds.
From there it was an natural transition to Road Cycling, then of course because I was surrounded by triathletes on Cape Cod, I got into Triathalon.
And I was never great at these sports. I loved every damn second of doing them, but I'm not an elite...at anything. I just like doing shit.
Life bounced me around a bit and I ended up in Worcester MA. I started training in Martial Arts there. I did some rock climbing. And I was able to keep up with my mountain biking believe it or not. Some of my favorite riding was just outside city limits.
Life Bounce again, this time to Brattleboro VT. Road cycling was out of the question, too dangerous. But now I could snowboard, snow shoe, and I got involved in White Water Kayaking.
Bounce to Reno NV. (2006-2011?)
The Reno-Tahoe area is a Mecca for athletes. I was able to mountain bike, road bike, run, start lifting weights, snowboard, kayak and cross country ski. I was fatefully introduced to Adventure Racing.
More importantly I was adopted by RH3 and the Hash House Harriers.
I'll spare you the entire sob story, but basically as my 2nd marriage was crumbling around me, I met two runners who asked if I would like to run with their group, the Reno Hash House Harriers. They mostly run trail and they have free beer at the end of the run. And their next run is Saturday night out in the desert, 10PM start time.
So of course I went! I'm a jock, I run at night all the time anyway, I'll go get in a solid run, call it good.
As soon as I arrive I can see this is not a typical training group.
Why are some dudes in kilts? Is that one dude wearing a Rugby helmet? Is she really going to run with that big pink boa thing. Who the? What the? Is that a stuffed animal?
Am I at the right place?
I was. And I'm real glad I stayed. I spent hours with these people running through the desert. When we would stop, I would be bent over with laughter. The kind of laughter that makes your gut hurt. I don't remember everything of my first run with RH3, but the experience will never leave me. And I made friends I will have a lifetime.
And I knew I had found a new and better group of friends than the snobby fucking roadies I was hanging with. A group of friends that never judged how much money I made, what kind of car I drove, what kind of beer I drank. A group of friends that only wanted to run a little bit, drink a little bit and stop stressing about the real world for even a little while.
(Not all roadies are snobs, I've known a few real cool roadies, and I miss them a lot.)
By now you may be wondering exactly what the Hash House Harriers are. Or what a Hasher is. It's probably not what you think. Nobody has to do anything with the drug Hash, we don't eat eggs and Hash, etc.
You can read the wiki. It gives a good run down. But trying to describe a Hash is like to trying to describe sushi to a hedgehog.
I am a Hasher. Given the choice, I will go to a Hash Event before most athletic events. There's a few exceptions, but I'd even skip Spartan Worlds to go to NURD any day.
But I'm also an Athlete. I may suck, but athletics are a part of me.
And here is born Hashletics.
The concept that anyone can be both a Hasher and an Athlete.
Me and my buddy Just Walt at Spartan Super New Jersey
My philosophy is then just to have as good a time as possible...
I like to sing and drink.
I also enjoy disrupting the norm sometimes.
Everybody wants to get better, faster, stronger, whatever. But why?
I mean I do. I'd love to be a better athlete.
But what does it take, and do I have it?
Infinitus 2015. I only made 52 out of 100 miles
NURD 2014. No stress here. Just a dude looking at me bum.
Crappy picture, but you get the idea.
Hashing is a sport. And it has a wonderful twist: If you finish first, you are soundly ridiculed and must pay a penalty. Cheating is often encouraged and there are no Rules, only Guidelines, and even those are open to personal translation. You can run as fast as you want, or just walk the entire time.
I have gotten to run through all parts of San Fransisco, Sacremento, Boston, New Haven, Saratoga Springs, etc. that most people will never have the opportunity to see. I've had fun every step of the way, I've made new friends every step of the way. Because of the Hash.
This is utter horse shit.
Half horse shit
The human body is a wonderful and amazing thing. But scientifically, anatomically and physically it's only capable of so much.
Look at that first bit of horse shit. What if you've sprained your ankle during a run? You didn't puke, faint or die.
Look at that second bit. Well maybe I want to bench 350lbs. But what if my muscles simply aren't designed for that?
Screw those kinds of attitudes. I know my own limits and when/how to push them.
And Hashletics is just that. The theory that I can train and race as hard or easy as I want and still have a really damn good time doing whatever the hell it is I'm doing, whether it's Poof Middle of Nowhere or the Big Blue Adventure Race.
Hero Rush 2013 (?)
PorME Prom 2014
Are you getting the idea yet? Probably. Hopefully...
It's a pretty positive attitude based in (my own) physical reality.
Some of my best friends are Hashers.
Some of my best friends Athletes.
And I'm kinda like a Reece's Peanut Butter Cup of the two. Because you can do both.
I hope this post has kind of given you an insight on what goes on upstairs in my cranium.
See you on trail.